08/8/12

A hateful post

I’m watching an episode of Paula Dean right now, and she’s makingĀ  an orzo salad.

In the beginning, it looked pretty darn yummy. Lots of veggies, Asian seasonings, slivered almonds, chicken breast. Something I could definitely get on board with. Until she added the water chestnuts.

Oh good lawdy water chestnuts. Disgusting!

As much as I preach about my distaste for picky eaters (yet I’m in love with one!), there are some foods on my own personal picky list that turn my stomach. I, for the most part, will try almost anything before declaring official hatred, with the exception of things like insects, or the like. I’m sure little critters have their place in the culinary world, but I won’t be chomping down on chocolate covered grasshoppers anytime soon. All buggin’ aside, here’s my current foodie “hate” list, in no particular order:

10. Water Chestnuts. Yup, the above mentioned corm, or plant stem, is not for me. Although the flavor is pretty mild, I cannot get passed the texture. Please don’t ruin spinach dips with these waxy little plastic tasting discs. Thanks.

9. Corned beef hash. The closest thing to human dog food in my book.

8. Canned soup. I’m not a big fan of soups in general, but canned soups make me want to hurl. Sorry Campbells!

7. Whole milk. Skim, all the way. Maybe 1%, but any more than that is pushing it!

6. Head cheese. I have literally been in line at the Publix deli with some sick bastard ordering this horrible concoction ahead of me and I made the person waiting on me use a different machine for my meat as to not taint it with the nastiness that is head cheese.

5. Cottage cheese. I’ll use it in recipes, but will never voluntarily sit down and eat a bowl of this lumpy white “stuff”. Even with fruit or some other topping. Ick!

4. Pearl onions. Especially jarred. I love onions, but the eyeball-y texture of these little spheres of doom just put me over the edge.

3. Organ meats. My grandparents would speak of the Great Depression and how organ meats (think liver and brain!) would be staples in their households. No, no, no!

2. Star anise. This Cuban cure for stomachaches would give me stomachaches. To this day the smell can cause dangerous levels of Stephnausea (yes, that’s a real word).

1. Brussel sprouts. I attended a private, very strict school for the first three years of my education. One day for lunch brussel sprouts were served. I took one bite of these nasty little smelly green brain shaped balls and spit it out with disgust. I missed recess that day because lunch rules said all children had to clean their plates. Screw that. And don’t tell me how delish they are roasted. Thanks, but no thanks!

So spill it. What’s on your foodie hate list?